Daughter of Eve

I am reading an incredible book right now by John and Stasi Eldredge called "Captivating". I want to share something from this book that really caught my attention. They are talking about Adam and Eve - how Eve was not just an afterthought. She was God's grand finale - the crown of creation! Women are given relational qualities that speak of God - vulnerability, tenderness, mercy, intimacy, and fierce devotion. God gave both Adam and Eve the mission to be fruitful and to conquer - not just Adam. That is because woman is meant to partner with man in the great adventure of life. She is desperately needed. How wonderful is that? It gets better...

They go on to show that when God created Eve, he called her an "ezer kenegdo". This is a Hebrew term that is very hard to translate. We have heard it called "helper" or "companion" or "help meet". But these terms fall short. Hebrew scholar Robert Alter translates it as "sustainer beside him". Let me quote from John & Stasi: "The word ezer is used only twenty other places in the entire Old Testament. And in every other instance the person being described is God Himself, when you need Him to come through for you desperately." That is awesome! Here are some scriptures where the term ezer is used:

"Blessed are you, O Israel! Who is like you, a people saved by the Lord? He is your shield and helper and your glorious sword." Deut. 33:26, 29

"I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2

"May the Lord answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you. May He send you help." Psalm 20:1-2

"We wait in hope for the Lord, He is our help and our shield." Psalm 33:20

These scriptures are in the context of life and death - where God is your only hope! John and Stasi go on to say, "If He is not there beside you...you are dead. A better translation therefore of ezer would be "lifesaver". Kenegdo means alongside, or opposite to, a couterpart." God does not call any of us, man or woman, to a safe life - remember Aslan who is definitely not safe, but always good? God calls us to live a life of risks - that's why we need Him to be our ezer. They go on to show us a woman who is very much a lifesaver - an ezer kenegdo - Arwen from The Lord of the Rings. She rides so valiantly to save Frodo - it's one of my favorite scenes and you know I love the line, "If you want him, come and take him!" Wow! Liv Tyler is so heroic in this part! The fate of middle earth rests on her shoulders!

I want to be an ezer kenegdo. I have wanted to be that all my life. I can see it now as I look back over my life. It is why I am the way I am. It is the answer to a question that has haunted me lately - really all my life. Why do I have this terrible need and craving for attention? The enemy has distorted this need - the psycho-babble world has turned it into some idiotic crutch and explanation for all my problems (ha!) - the church has turned it into something shameful and sinful (ha!). But what God is showing me is that it is really a base need of women in general. Men don't feel this constant need for attention and affirmation. I am beginning to see that even as a little girl, I wanted to be included in an adventure of some sort. I could sense the bigger spiritual picture even as a child. I could see my parents having a part in it, my friends, my church, etc. I just wanted to be included in that bigger picture - that heroic spiritual battle. I wanted to be desperately needed - to know that I possess something that fills a role no one else can fill. It is an even stronger need today in my life. As I approach 40 (quickly I might add...) I find myself jumping up and down and yelling at Darrel - "Here I am! Hey! Over here! Remember me?! The one you desperately need?! Your ezer kenegdo?! Come on! Quick! Grab my hand! Don't leave me behind! Take me with you on this incredible adventure!" All Darrel knows is that sometimes I am tremendously needy - it is a failure of communication in our relationship. He just feels a pressure while I'm just trying to get him to notice me and take me along with him. I think a lot of couples struggle with this. I think many women contemplate abandoning their mundane lives and striking out on some kind of adventure - even the adventure of being single again. Is it right? No, it's not what God has for us as women. It is settling for second best when we consider the option of divorce simply because we feel our lives are stuck in a blah rut. God wants our relationships to flourish the way He created them to flourish - He wants the men to see their wives for the ezer kenegdos they are! He wants the women to see their husbands for the priests and leaders and Indiana Jones' that they are! Then He desires that they, as one, strike out on this awesome adventure of life together.

As someone has recently dubbed me a "know-it-all", I have to laugh. I certainly know very little comparitively. I do not have all the answers. I only love to share with you the tidbits that God lays on my heart throughout the day. It is meant for encouragement and never for condemnation. I am a sojourner with you on this bendy road to eternity. Have a great day and we'll talk again soon.